93 | See Then Spend

Two of our three children have allowance jars. They get $1 per week that is disconnected from any chore or activity within the household.

My wife noticed that the jars tend to accumulate dollars when the kids are not thinking about them, but if the jars are top of mind, then there is always something to buy.

If they see, then they spend.

This feels eerily similar to how many of us still operate our financial household in adulthood.

We look at our account balances and then decide to spend dollars if there are enough there.

Or we look at our account balances and then decide not to spend dollars because there isn’t enough there.

Both modes of operating are just like a kid with an allowance jar - see then spend.

The challenge is that in either case, the money is at risk of driving the decision more than the values.

If there is more, then spend. If there is less, then don’t spend.

I think we all want the freedom to be able to spend or not spend without having to look every single time - decisions that aren’t determined by the dollars.

Of course, I’m not granting permission to spend without ever looking - that inevitably leads to a nagging shortfall of contentment or a perpetual uneasiness about viability.

I’m more describing a special freedom that accompanies a consistent routine of reflecting on spending and saving - without judgment, shame, or blame - that begins to allow values to drive decisions instead of account balances.

We can spend, then we can see.

This freedom isn’t tied to dollars in the jar, but a willingness to exchange 1,000 account balance refreshes or 100 “missed budgets” with 1 honest reflection.

Additional Reading

The freedom loop by Seth Godin