158 | It Doesn’t Bother Me

I'd rather us knock it out together.

And "it" could be a lot of things - but usually it's the things that have a knack for staying on the to-do list indefinitely.

Of course, it might mean I'm watching you reset a password or type in your name. It might mean we're sitting on hold together. It might mean we're both trying to figure out how something we've never done before actually works.

Even if a moment or two feels awkward, I still want to do it together.

Because there is always going to be a grenade planted somewhere in the process - teeny parts of the financial world that derail our most honest efforts or plant seeds of confusion and doubt that make us wonder what else we don't know.

Inevitably, if we do it together, it will go faster, there will be fewer errors and second-guessing, our relationship will deepen, and it will feel like we've made real progress.

So no, it doesn't bother me to do it together.

157 | My Role as I See It

To improve individuals’ relationship with money by making finances simpler and breaking down the taboo nature of money.

90 | We Are Probably NOT a Good Fit if You…

The most important thing we can do is ensure that we will work well with one another.

If we're not a good fit, we will both eventually regret it.

This business is different from any other financial planning business you have ever encountered.

It is intentionally designed to achieve different outcomes, but it is not for everyone.

We have found that there are certain desires, characteristics, and feelings that many of our clients have that make them a good fit.

We have also found that there are certain desires, characteristics, and feelings that serve as red flags for starting a relationship.

We are probably NOT a good fit if you:

Desire…

• Stock tips and speculative shop talk or someone you can call your "investment guy"
• Detailed calculations predicting the future or a promise that you'll be able to retire in a certain month in 22 years
• Complex solutions and products that you don't understand
• Control more than curiosity
• To see invested dollars only go up in value without any seasons of down along the way
• To continue paying fees to your advisor out of your account because even if they're exorbitant at least they are out of sight and out of mind

Don't know...

• How it's possible to have success with money without being in tune with where the market has been, where it is, and where it's going next year
• How you could have a real conversation about finances outside of a conference room setting
• How behavior could possibly have a greater impact on our well being than the newest tips, tricks, and tactics
• If you can trust seven colored bars to tell your financial story more completely than any other tool you've ever used

Are hesitant to...

• To block out the noise of financial social media or your most financially vocal family member or friend or CNBC
• Entertain the idea that "more" might not be the only solution
• To share all of your finances with a single person or log into an account online and share your screen in order to gather the most useful information

Feel...

• Like it's possible to game the system
• Like you should be able to figure out money on your own because, if you can't, you're not doing your job
• Like paying someone to help you make financial decisions is an expense instead of an investment
• Like a political administration is the biggest threat to your future financial well being
• Like a "one time" plan or conversation is all you need to get the ship headed in the right direction
• Like it is a waste of time to talk about the non-numbers side of your relationship with money

Appreciate...

• Getting assigned homework to do on your own instead of putting heads together to knock out tasks as a team
• Being able to talk about money once per year (or never!) in hopes that it will fix itself with time
• The personal nature of phone tag and back and forth emails over the ease of of a scheduling software that allows you to pick your best time
• Making tactical moves with your investments at the top and bottom of market cycles

89 | We Are Probably a Good Fit if You…

The most important thing we can do is ensure that we will work well with one another.

If we're not a good fit, we will both eventually regret it.

This business is different from any other financial planning business you have ever encountered.

It is intentionally designed to achieve different outcomes, but it is not for everyone.

We have found that there are certain desires, characteristics, and feelings that many of our clients have that make them a good fit.

All of them may not resonate, but if a few do then maybe it's time for us to connect.

We are probably a good fit if you:

Desire…

• To think of money as a tool to drive purpose and meaning instead of a permanently scarce resource on an imaginary scoreboard
• To pursue work that is more than a paycheck that leaves you counting down to your retirement date
• To talk about more than just investments, insurance, and/or certainty-promising retirement projections
• To buck the 9a to 5p work culture, live in a new place, switch careers, start a new business, or navigate a life transition
• To stop paying 1+% on your managed assets and still wonder what to do with the rest of your finances (even the most altruistic advisors can feel like asset gatherers!)
• To fundamentally change your relationship with money (easiest with folks in their 30s and 40s or the most nimble-minded in their 50s and 60s)

Don't know...

• The first question to ask
• Where exactly you want to go (we'll help you figure it out...over time)
• Where the goalposts are (few people do)
• How to keep the goalposts from constantly moving (you are not alone)
• Anything about investing or "the market"
• Why the dollar amount of your assets impacts how much you have to pay for advice from most other financial advisors

Are tired of...

• Trying to categorize your spending or set budgets only to be discouraged when you run out of energy to keep it up
• Feeling like the questions in your head are not appropriate to ask out loud
• Financial jargon and fearmongers
• "Comprehensive" and "holistic" planning only speaking to your investments
• Long lists of complicated recommendations that you can't get done
• DIY'ing your finances because the endless research inevitably goes in circles (and that second guessing though!)
• That feeling of leaving a meeting with an advisor and feeling like you should understand what was discussed better than you do

Feel...

• Like your income keeps growing and you keep saving, but your feelings about the future aren't changing
• Like conversations about money, particularly with people you love the most, are hard to have
• Like you’re getting a lot of conflicting advice from a lot of different parties
• Overwhelmed by the options and decisions that you have to make about money
• Inspired to change the money stories and scripts that play on repeat in your head
• Coachable and open-minded

Appreciate...

• That investments aren't the secret to financial well being
• Numbers taking a back seat to real life
• Conversations and questions more than analysis and projections
• Rolling up sleeves instead of shooting the breeze
• That simple things can still be hard to do
• That neither you or I can predict the future
• That you'll have to want it for yourself more than I want it for you (keep reading the blog if you need to appreciate how much I want it for you!)

57 | Why a "Financial Coach"?

Frankly, it's hard to know the best title for someone that helps people with their financial well-being in this day and age.

"Advisor" sounds a little stale, a little formal, and a little out of date.

It's used by too many people that might not have any impact on improving your real financial well-being and I think it implies some unique ability to control the markets that no one actually has.

"Planner" sounds a little too focused on the numbers, a little too rigid, and a little too specialized.

It's closer than "advisor", but I think it still implies some ability to predict the future by crunching the numbers a little better than the next person or doing the impossible task of drawing up a plan that eliminates uncertainty. Yes, as a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™, I do appreciate the irony of this perspective.

"Coach" sounds a little informal on the surface, but it is exactly how I hope to interact with every client.

With a coach, there is no doubt that he or she is 100% on your team.

A coach is an integral part of the story, but never the hero.

A coach empowers the player.

A coach helps the player see things that can't be seen when they are playing the game.

​A coach knows all the rules and strategies to use in the game even if he or she doesn’t use them all the time.

A coach knows that the gameplan has to be flexible - sometimes in the first minute, sometimes at halftime, sometimes in the final minute, but always flexible.

A coach knows that even if it's discussed or practiced, it still might not happen in the game and that's OK.

A coach directs focus to the things that matter the most.

A coach knows that you can control the process, but you can't control every outcome.

A coach's impact can be felt on a single play, but is most significant over the course of a season or an entire career.

A coach does not see you as who you are today, but who you can and will be someday.

A coach is with you in the wins and in the losses.

Over time, a good coach shares enough life experience, builds enough trust, and earns enough respect that you can't imagine playing the game without them even though you probably could.

Additional Reading

Don’t worry about playing a game better when there’s a better game to play by Paul Davies

How to deal with investing blind spots by Carl Richards